So I was trying to watch a good scary movie in the theater recently when things suddenly got a whole lot scarier. Hipsters walked in the door. You might be asking yourself why hipsters cause such dread in the souls of other human beings. You might not necessarily even be a hipster to be asking that question. Well, I'll explain it succintly: hipsters think they're cool enough to get away with shit that they would never tolerate from other people. To wit, the idiots who interrupted a screening of a spooky movie. It would not have been a social foul for them to walk in late, but they had to walk in late and then proceed to navigate their trendily-clad asses past an entire row of people trying to watch the movie. This was not due to a shortage in available seats. Maybe they thought everyone wanted to appreciate their cunning fashion sense? We didn't. Then they must have thought we wanted to appreciate their witticisms as they texted other people and exclaimed over the texts all during the rest of the movie. Hipsters, nobody cares about your texts. The final straw, though was during an eery scene which was suddenly interrupted by somebody's hand shadow reaching into the projector light to "snatch" at the smoke. Granted, it was kinda funny the first time they did it. It was not amusing the rest of the 10 times. Not cute, hipsters. Not cute.